The other day I went straight to the beach in what you could call nothing short of a desperate attempt to face plant into the sand with a view of the ocean. Well, I guess I can’t really see much of the ocean if my face is in the sand, but you get what I’m saying, right?
As I helplessly layed there, sprawled out on the towel; nothing but me, the beach, a book, my headphones blaring some Bethel worship music, and … my water bottle.
Funny thing about the water bottle part, other than the fact that I have an obsession with a water bottle (not weird or anything), is the sticker I haphazardly threw on it.
The Hawaii-originated lifestyle brand, He is greater than i (HE>i) makes some super cool apparel, stickers, and other designs, so naturally, your girl had to get some. I ordered a few stickers and placed my favorite one smack on the water bottle. Don’t get me wrong, I love the message and I love what it stands for–so yes, that part was intentional. But I never imagined the daily reminder it would serve or the insane affect it would have on me on a random Wednesday afternoon.
Because as I sat there, staring out at the horizon–good God, that incredibly beautiful meeting point of sky and ocean, I became overwhelmed with His presence. Which, I’m pretty sure, is why I was so desperate to get to the beach in the first place. That day, I just knew I had a divine appointment to keep.
I glanced down at my water bottle with its “He>i” sticker, and one of my favorite verses from Psalm struck me: “As a deer pants for water, so my soul pants for you, O God” (Psalm 42:1).
HE>i … On my water bottle.
I started sipping, and with every drink of that water bottle, I became transfixed on the fact that every bit as much as my earthly body needs a steady flow of purified water, my soul needs His untainted word, His love, His grace.
As I sat there, tuning out and tuning into His presence, I became all the more aware of the fact that our God is the same heavenly Father of Jesus, the one who guided Peter to walk on water, led Moses through the parting of the Red Sea, had Daniel defeat Goliath, executed more miracles than we (and my limited knowledge of Biblical history + theology) could ever track, died on the cross for ME (and you) AND then had the audacity to resurrect from the GRAVE.
When it seemed like everything was lost, it wasn’t. Not even close.
So why is it that I doubt His ability (or promise) to work in my own life? Why is it that I think, “Oh, it must be nice for ‘them‘, but that would never happen to ‘me‘?” Why do I allow the impatience of what will be, detract me from the embrace of what is?
But the thing is, our God is no more ‘theirs’ as He is ‘mine’. And what he has for them, isn’t for me, and what’s for me, isn’t for them.
Thank goodness, I can rest in knowing nothing can change that.
As I picked up my water bottle, and took a drink from it in the hot, humid, August heat; my thoughts started to severely outpace my ability to record them and e v e r y t h i n g–every worry, every doubt, every concern, every fear, every pain, every ounce of fatigue and “not enough-ness” dissipated.
What you’ll read below is simply an unaltered record of what I scrambled to write on a note in my phone at that moment, in an outpouring of prayer + worship:
Lord–my God, You don’t miss a thing. You never forget. You’re never late, or busy, or absent, or out doing the bigger-better -deal. You’re never asleep, you’re never turned off or tuned out, you’re never distracted, side-tracked, incompetent or not listening.
Your ways are nothing like my ways. Thank you for always ‘picking up the phone’, for always ‘receiving my texts’, ‘hearing my voicemails’, ‘responding to my emails’, ‘double tapping my photos’, ‘commenting where I need encouragement’, keeping me straight where I need humility and a reality check, and for never speaking out of anything but grace, truth, and relentless love.
Your mercies renew and refresh me each morning. Your availability and stamina supersede that of any earthly thing or persona.
You are in e v e r y t h i n g.
You are healing, inspiration, creation, words, vision, dreams, and the desires of my heart.
The tune to which I sing my freest of songs comes from You and you alone.
No earthly lack is capable of taking, changing, editing, filtering, or altering the promises you’ve already spoken over my life.
N o t h i n g can change the identity and fullness I have in you.
Nothing can stay dark in your presence.
There is a crack in everything; a crack that only you can illuminate. And that’s precisely how Your light gets in.
You hung and number the stars. You move the sea. You turn the earth, You pull the tides.You raise and lower the sun. Without fail.
And still, you know me. Not just on the surface, but with every fiber of my being. The good, the bad, the spectrum of colors, the highs, and the deepest of lows. When I misunderstand, you understand me.
In my impatience, irritability, shortness, selfishness, blindness, stubbornness, rebellion, and crippling under stress–You still speak to me in whispers of nothing but love. Not because you can’t shout, but because you’re that close.
Prince of peace, c r a s h over me.
In you, I am worthy. I am a child of God. I am the daughter of a King.
In you I am unshakeable, immovable, planted, grounded, and simultaneously lifted–outstretched to the heavens.
You don’t miss a thing.
I will drink from your living water, I will claim dominion over my life every day, for the battle has already been won.
As a deer pans for water, so my souls pants for you.
By the faintness of a sea breeze, by the mist of a crashing wave, I finally tune in. I feel your presence.
You are in e v e r y t h i n g.
If only, I would take the time to notice, and give credit where credit is due. So by your hand, step by step. I will walk even when I’d rather run. I will trust, I will forgive again and again.
You make me brave. C r a s h over me.
All the world will one day know your glory. For your scale & your magnitude is imaginable. Seated on the throne, commanding all that roam. You are as much the God of & in me, as the God that’s available to everyone around me. I am yours and You are mine.
Salvation. Restoration. Sanctification. Peace. Vigor. This is what it means to be in relationship with you.
For in You, all is new.
Thank you, Jesus.
Yeaaa…whoa. This went on and on and when I finally lifted my head, I’d lost track of time. The beach had cleared out quite a bit and I sat, amazed, and finally – without words.